NOTES ON CREATIVE IDENTITY
Last week I asked what keeps pulling at your attention, the quiet things that keep returning even when you dismiss them. This week I want to ask about the other voice in that same conversation: what you're still doing simply because you already know how.
There is a kind of work that becomes very easy to say yes to.
You know how to do it. You know how long it will take. You know what good looks like. Other people already trust you with it. There is no awkward beginning, no need to prove yourself, no uncertainty about whether you will be able to deliver.
Competence is reassuring.
It can also create momentum.
A client asks. You say yes. Someone recommends you. Another piece of work arrives. An opportunity appears that looks almost exactly like the last one, and because you know how to do it, taking it on seems sensible.
Competence is reassuring. It can also create momentum.
There may be nothing wrong with any of this. Work has to pay for things. Expertise is hard earned. Being known for something can be deeply satisfying. There are parts of my own working life I became very good at, and I know how pleasurable it can be to feel competent.
But I think there is a question worth asking every now and then: Would I still choose this if I were not already good at it?
That is a very different question from whether you can do the work.
Sometimes the answer will be an immediate yes. You are still interested. You still want to get better. The work still challenges you. You like the people. You enjoy the problems it asks you to solve.
Good.
But sometimes the answer is less clear. You realise you are doing the work partly because it keeps arriving. Or because it would seem strange to turn it down. Or because you have spent so many years becoming this person that choosing something else feels almost wasteful.
This is where competence can become confusing.
We tend to think of being good at something as evidence that we should continue doing it. Usually there is some truth in that. Skill gives us options. Experience gives us judgement. A reputation can create freedom as well as responsibility.
But capability and desire are not the same thing.
You can still be very good at work you no longer want quite so much of.
That does not mean the work has become meaningless. It does not mean the years were wasted. And it certainly does not mean you need to walk away from your career on Tuesday afternoon.
It just means there may be some new information available.
You can still be very good at work you no longer want quite so much of.
I think one of the difficulties of becoming experienced is that the world gets very good at reflecting your competence back to you. People know what to call you for. They know what box to put you in. They know what you can solve. And because you can solve it, you keep being asked.
Meanwhile, something you are less established in may be asking for your attention.
The problem is that the established thing comes with evidence. The newer thing often does not. One has clients, history, skills, contacts, perhaps money. The other may have little more than interest.
Of course the established thing feels more legitimate. But legitimacy is not always the same as direction.
Sometimes the hardest work to stop doing is the work you are still very good at. Not because anybody is forcing you. Because there is no obvious reason to stop. The work is still good. People still value it. You can still do it.
Legitimacy is not always the same as direction.
And yet perhaps you notice a small reluctance before saying yes. Perhaps you feel relief when a familiar project gets cancelled. Perhaps you find yourself more interested in the thing you are doing on Thursday afternoon than the thing you have spent twenty years becoming known for.
Again, none of this is a verdict. It is information.
The question is not: Should I give this up? The question might simply be: Am I still choosing this, or have I become very good at automatically saying yes?
That distinction matters. Because a working life can fill itself surprisingly quickly with things we are capable of doing. And if we never stop to look at what we are saying yes to, there may not be much room left for anything else.
There are also perfectly good reasons to keep doing work that is not the centre of your creative life. Money is one. Stability is another. Responsibility matters. Sometimes the work you are good at funds the work you are curious about.
There is no purity test here. I am much more interested in whether the choice is conscious.
You may decide that a particular kind of work is worth keeping because it gives you flexibility. You may decide to do less of it. You may want to change the conditions rather than the work itself. You may discover you actually still love it.
I am much more interested in whether the choice is conscious.
All of those are useful things to know. The important thing is that competence does not make the decision for you.
Being good at something tells you that you can do it. It does not automatically tell you how much of your life you want to give it.
Perhaps that is the question worth carrying for a while. Not: What should I stop doing? But: What am I still saying yes to simply because I know how?
A small invitation
Look at one thing you have agreed to do this week. Not necessarily something you dislike. Just something familiar.
Ask yourself: If I were not already good at this, would I still be interested in doing it?
You do not need to change anything. Just notice the answer.
Notes on Creative Identity is a weekly reflection on creative work, creative practice and what it takes to remain connected to the person inside the work.
Parish Stapleton
Creativity Coach, artist and writer